“3 Minutes To Live 1% Happier”

Reality: The Core Of All Communication Is This

2023.11.14 | #36

Happy Reality Day! Here is your weekly dose of reality to help you live 1% happier↓

1 Insight From Me

I work at a Starbucks every day.

Two weeks ago, one day I heard two foreigners chatting there, so I walked over and joined them and started chatting. During the chat, they accidentally mentioned that they were learning Chinese at a language school in Beihai, which was still recruiting teachers. Because I like to meet people with various experiences, I made a resume and sent it out the next day. A week later I saw them again at school, but as “Teacher Ted”.

“Teaching Chinese should be just a piece of cake. If I can teach preschool, I can teach foreigners.” Teacher Ted thought to himself.

My face got slapped so hard.

Because after I started, I realized that the learning process of the only two languages ​​​​that I currently speak fluently, Chinese and English, are actually not the normal process of learning a language. They were learned slowly over many years. For people who learn languages ​​as adults, the goal is generally to master a language in a short period of time, which actually use an almost completely different set of methods.

A method that I don’t know.

But there is more. More importantly, we must be able to stand from the perspective of foreigners and understand why they think Chinese is the most difficult language in the world. What exactly is the difficulty? If I were him, what would be my inner thoughts when faced with these Chinese characters.

And this is actually the core of communication: empathy.

After looking from the perspective of a student, many things become clear.

So although I am a teacher on the outside, inside I am actually also a student learning together with them, researching a set of methods for learning and teaching others a new language.

(However, this method won’t come soon, because I want to use it to actually learn a new language, and then I can report it to you after it is tested in practice.)

1 Insight From Others

“When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.” – Ernest Hemingway

1 Small Step To Take

“Look him in the eyes”

Next time you are chatting with someone, look them in the eye and pay full attention to what they are saying.

When most people chat with others, they seem to be listening, but in their minds they are actually thinking about what they are going to say after the person finish speaking. Try just listening, think about it after listening and before speaking, and be silent when you need to. Who said you can’t stop and think during a chat?

PS: What does “mentally strong” mean?

Do you find this issue of Reality helpful? Leave a reply to this email, I check every reply in my inbox.

Until next week,

Ted Wild

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